Browse Category: Disciplining & Connection

5 Parenting tips to ignore – outdating parenting advice

A picture by Christina Wocintechc

Parenting can be daunting especially for new moms and dads and certainly there is no one size fits all strategy. I was the youngest in the family which means I had never seen an actual baby let alone take care of it – cousins and everyone are there sure but you play with them for some time and give it back when it gets down to business.

So naturally I would run to my Mom for everything and anything when my son came along. Because, you know, of course she has already raised two kids and done a pretty good job (we are still breathing YAY).

But the times have changed – so much has changed that we now live in a world where we ourselves are teaching our kids not to share their food or toys with their friends while just 3 months back we were trying to push them in that park to make some friends by sharing cookies/ have heartfelt handshakes and hugs / play in the mud and share toys.

So probably with this big change certainly there are some outdated parenting advice which are downright wrong and needs no passing down to the future generation, let’s go through them and put an end to these advices:

  • Praising your kids too much :
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Parenting In a Pandemic: Start Of Virtual Learning

A Mom reading a parenting Book picture by kelly Sikemma

Many of our lives have gone for a toss in these pandemic times; we are more than ever unsure about anything in our lives. People are losing jobs and economies grappling to survive.

And just like adults’, children are also trying to get hold of themselves, suddenly their lives have changed upside down and they can no longer visit their friends or go to schools or do some sporting/leisure activities. I hear all the time parents complaining about schools and how they not providing value education via online inspite of paying huge fees.

First of all, I think we all need to accept the situation as it is – we know it might take many more months for everything to get back to normal so perhaps this might be the best opportunity to prepare our children for “the change”.

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3 ways to Raise Independent Kids

A picture by Gabe Pierce

I am a mother to a 2 year old boy and before he came into our lives we were totally immersed into a life of adventure and carefree attitude – weekend shoppings, signing up for any kind of fun classes, inviting friends and partying late at nights. Well! When I knew I was pregnant it was the most happiest day of my life while today I am constantly juggling to my son’s every wish and fancy.

Believe me, a lot of times I think to myself I didn’t sign up for this Mama! But eh! Man plans, God Disposes. Plus these tiny little human beings are totally incapable of taking care of themselves so I made my life’s mission to talk to some moms of elderly boys or whoever would like to share their secrets with me on how to raise independent kids. I made it very clear in my head that I am going to raise my child as an independent child who knows how to cater to their own needs and wants.

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Which parenting style is better – strict or lenient?

A picture by James Wheeler

Today as the world changes gradually I see a lot of communication going on between parents and children, parents are ready to nurture and hold the little one’s precious little hands at every hurdle of life. Earlier in my days me and my parents never spoke about any topic under the sun which makes me think which of the two generations is doing a good job – are we millennials parents taking up the game a notch higher and just talking and talking to our children even on topics where it is not required or were our parents right by not attending to every little hunch.

Well I remember in my household showing affection or even talking about it (I for sure don’t remember the last time my father hugged me LOL as am sure you won’t either) was a rare scene and now there are tons and tons of books being written on how to show affection to your child for their proper cognitive development. As babies parents tend to overflow their love on them with kisses and hugs and as soon as they grow up the awkward gap just grows and grows until it becomes a generation gap where nobody understands each other (although everyone is talking the same thing) with periodic bouts of shouting and yelling.

And before you think of something – YES I was grown in a perfectly happy family and am sure you also resonate to some of these occasional bouts although very few admit to it because we all are apparently living in a world where it becomes imperative to assure yourself and others all the time that you are happy instead of dealing with the elephant in the room.

So all this rumination followed by a lot of reading, talking, research and a few podcasts led me to think which style of parenting I am going to adapt – should I be more like my parents vis-à-vis Strict or lenient like many millennial parents are in today’s age.

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Can your Upbringing cloud your judgment or decision-making skills?

A Picture from Charu Chaturvedi

Am sure if I ask this question in a hall full of people majority of the answer to this would be yes our upbringing does have an influence on our decision making. We are made up of beliefs and values which are to each their own but how do these belief and values form and when does it start interfering in our decision-making capabilities?

Like Mark Manson mentions in his famous book (The subtle art of not giving a fu*k) we are always making decisions – whether consciously or unconsciously – even to not make a decision is also a decision in itself.

And we all have our own value systems – some might think owning a house in a suburban community is a measure of success while for another person owning a luxury car ticks off an item from the list while some people long for emotional attachments like staying with your family and having kids and seeing them grow.

So the question is are we really making decisions based on our value systems and if the answer is yes then how much does our upbringing plays a part in it? If I talk about myself then yes I agree with the above statements but I also believe that two children living under same roof having same parents and living a similar life can have totally different value systems or decision making skills and that’s the beauty of humans I guess. We all can have same input of information or influences in our lives and yet the outcome i.e., our perceptions, intelligence, ability to understand something is totally different from each other.

A Picture from Richard R
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How to raise a Tiny Human Being?

My father was a Central Government Employee and as a result, we moved a lot. I have studied in 3 different schools in my lifetime and made dozens of friends I guess from every state of India if that’s possible. And consequently, I started loving this nomad lifestyle and exploring different places on the earth.

A Picture from Paolo Bendandi

Then life changed and I got my son and this lifestyle doesn’t make any sense. More than ever I miss my parents and a sense of community. Every decision we make revolves around the tiny human being we created. And then I stumbled over an African saying:

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Social Media or Living in a Bubble?

Baby Creating a mess but learning to Paint. Do Something.

A few years back I was obsessed with the social media – Orkut, Facebook, Instagram obsessing upon the likes and comments which I get on all the new cool pictures or videos I used to upload, While the truth is you cannot run away from it but you can definitely limit the exposure.

Day and night we keep scrolling on our smartphone screens or iPads half-heartedly reading some posts, scanning through them only to understand a quarter of it while creating a full fuss about it.

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How to make your child share his/her toys?

One fine evening when I was strolling around the park and talking to a good friend, I heard some whimpering –turned around to see my son dueling over a ball with another kid.

Don’t worry this was a time when there was no lockdown and everyone was free as a bird.

My friend jumped over to her son’s rescue making sure no child is getting hurt and I kept observing my son on how reluctant he was to share his ball with another kid. No amounts of talking or good words were making him challenge his decision. He won’t even bat an eye for my “I-am-going-to-tell-your-dad” threats or consequences.

And that’s when it occurred to me on how painstaking it is for a parent to make a child share his/her toys or for that matter any of the child’s stuff with their other sibling. So without further ado, let’s jump right in:

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A Time When there was No Lockdown

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Teachings from “The Lion King” we need to know

Wouldn’t it be cool if you could teach your child something new without even lifting a finger! 

Lion King (2019)

As I was growing up “The Lion King” was one of my favorite movies and my happiness had no bounds when I saw Disney making the remake of this awesome movie in 2019.

My son just loves this spectacular movie and you know what it has a lot of teachings just like Kung fu Panda. 

Here are a few:

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