Childbirth is an excruciating process. Not just your body changes physically and mentally it also takes a toll on your relationships. It is a blissful even in a couple’s life but somewhat we Asians tend to not take post-partum depression very seriously.
In clinical terminology, it is known as postnatal depression which can occur in either of the parent after the birth of the baby. The symptoms are anxiety, a feeling of sadness, very low energy levels, and changes in eating and sleeping pattern. While one thing that should be noted here is that some of these symptoms will occur in newborn parents in some way or the other while it cannot be termed as depression at all.
For 42 weeks a baby’s home is the mother’s womb and they couldn’t ask for a better home. It’s an ideal environment for growth and development, thanks to all the high-tech machinery of our age, now we can actually see our fetus developing into the human baby and all the physiological changes happening around in the womb.
Cut to the labor room and there is our newborn after long hours of struggle(both for the mother and baby) screaming on top of his voice not knowing why suddenly there is so much noise and blinding light around. As his organs start transitioning to the new normal – a transition from the safe womb to the world – there are chances that they get vulnerable to a few issues.
Now babies have been coming into this world since the very beginning of life so it can be assumed that Mother Nature has bestowed upon us some survival instincts and almost every newborn gets over with these common issues cited below. But still, we no longer live in the perfect world it used to be, we live in a polluted world connected digitally so there are chances that some of these imperfections could be causing discomfort for our newborn.
Below are some of the issues which I faced when I had my child and how I over-came with them, hope it helps:
My father was a Central Government Employee and as a result, we moved a lot. I have studied in 3 different schools in my lifetime and made dozens of friends I guess from every state of India if that’s possible. And consequently, I started loving this nomad lifestyle and exploring different places on the earth.
Then life changed and I got my son and this lifestyle doesn’t make any sense. More than ever I miss my parents and a sense of community. Every decision we make revolves around the tiny human being we created. And then I stumbled over an African saying:
When I gave birth to my son two years back I assumed the hardest part is over and am sure parenting wouldn’t be that tough.
And I am pretty sure almost every new parent thinks that they know enough about parenting or they can follow the path carved by their parents and follow the same route. Well if every child is different then why should our parenting styles be the same?
I recently watched a Netflix series names “Babies” just to realize that as a mother or father the main lesson to learn is that learning never stops – Every solution is just a stepping stone to a whole new problem. At some time in the past, I was over-agonizing on when my 14-month-old will start jumping and running like other children while now I have a new set of problems as he hovers around the house making a complete mess.
So here are the 3 new research findings about parenting which every parent doesn’t know – Yet!
As per a recent study, approximately 70 percent of women suffer from morning sickness starting as early as 6 weeks and may peak around the eighth and ninth weeks, about fifty percent of women experiencing vomiting and nausea which can vary from day to day or some particular time in the day.
To be honest I was the fortunate ones who never had any episodes of morning sickness but I have many friends who had the worst. Your body is going through a lot of changes to make it hospitable for the little one to grow and little you knew that you would be barging into the bathroom every morning and feel absolutely the worst and to add insult to injury this can go on until afternoon or evening and make anyone wonder why the name “morning sickness” in the first place then.
There are some traditional remedies (which can be found in our kitchen) which have been known for ages and which will prevent you from your frequent trips to the doctor’s office. These might or might not work for you but I would suggest if you have a very bad case of nausea and sickness then to get professional help but at least these might temporarily help you feel better until you get to the nearest hospital.
And a word of caution for the worrying mothers –
Our body is a wonderful machine and don’t fret that you are not able to feed yourself or you are vomiting everything even at the slightest smell or sight, your baby’s development will be just fine.
A few years back I was obsessed with the social media – Orkut, Facebook, Instagram obsessing upon the likes and comments which I get on all the new cool pictures or videos I used to upload, While the truth is you cannot run away from it but you can definitely limit the exposure.
Day and night we keep scrolling on our smartphone screens or iPads half-heartedly reading some posts, scanning through them only to understand a quarter of it while creating a full fuss about it.
We have all been stuck at home for weeks now and I am hoping and praying everybody is safe and healthy as you read this!
Lockdown has created a silent havoc in our lives, changed our routines & messed our schedules – It is almost as if living in medieval times with a boon of the Internet, making us able to look out for our loved ones from the comfort of our homes. But in all this, the only person whose workload has increased many folds is a Mother.
Not that I am being partial to Fathers here, but generally mothers are over-burdened by heaps of house chores and looking after the kids and the numerous work emails and calls you attend to. Now if you are a business owner, hats off to the amount of work you get done in this crazy time. So for your ease, I have combined a few easy activities which can keep your toddler happy, cranky-free & occupied (hopefully for a good amount of time).
Now make no mistakes these ideas are nothing out of the world or you might have not heard of. These are some easy-peasy ways which have worked for me at this time and I would like to share them with you. So let’s jump right in:
One fine evening when I was strolling around the park and talking to a good friend, I heard some whimpering –turned around to see my son dueling over a ball with another kid.
Don’t worry this was a time when there was no lockdown and everyone was free as a bird.
My friend jumped over to her son’s rescue making sure no child is getting hurt and I kept observing my son on how reluctant he was to share his ball with another kid. No amounts of talking or good words were making him challenge his decision. He won’t even bat an eye for my “I-am-going-to-tell-your-dad” threats or consequences.
And that’s when it occurred to me on how painstaking it is for a parent to make a child share his/her toys or for that matter any of the child’s stuff with their other sibling. So without further ado, let’s jump right in:
The world would have been so much better only if we didn’t have to struggle so much to make our kids eat or probably make them eat the food they should be eating.
I started off weaning my son when he was 5 months old. As per the Department of Health weaning should start when your baby is 6 months old but having spoken to my doctor and a few friends who seem to have good expertise in this area I decided to put him on solids one month before the set date.
My son wouldn’t even open his mouth to eat it let alone eat it; he would just sniff it, make a face and turn around his face. It was so devastating to see the food go waste which you so laboriously prepared. Not that I would throw away the meal; I had to eat it myself or at least a portion of it but that was not the task.
But I kept at it, more than to my son consoling myself that one day he is going to finish the meal.
With time I understood some tricks of the trade and would like to share them with you guys as well: